Thirty Years...

A lot can happen in thirty years.  Babies are born, children turn into adults, loved ones pass away, friends move, hair turns grey, young lovers become husband and wife, friends and relatives are suddenly parents and then grandparents, Christmas cards are exchanged, birthdays and anniversaries are remembered, reunions are treasured, vacations are enjoyed, graduations are celebrated, and we wonder where the time went.

Lance and I will be married thirty years this month.

When I was a kid, I couldn't imagine spending a lifetime with one person.  Now I can't imagine spending it without that one person.  Funny how things can change.

I firmly believe Lance and I were destined to meet and marry.

We did not know each other as kids, didn't grow up in the same town, or even live anywhere remotely close to each other. Lance grew up in McHenry, Illinois - I grew up in Merrill, Wisconsin.  He was on his high school swim team.  I was a self-taught swimmer..  He lived in a suburb of Chicago.  I lived in a central Wisconsin small town.  He went on family trips to Colorado.  My family never left the state of Wisconsin.  Our lives were very different.

In his Junior year of high school, Lance's parents bought a Sears Catalog store in Cornell, Wisconsin.  We didn't know it, but our lives were about to become much closer. Because of the move to Cornell, Lance ended up going to college in Eau Claire, Wisconsin.  And where did I graduate college from?  You got it - the University of Wisconsin, Eau Claire.  Ah-ha you say - the two of you met in college.  Nope, but we did have some mutual acquaintances. 

After graduation, I became an assistant manager with K-Mart; Lance took a job as an assistant manager with Shopko.  As luck - or fate - would have it, we both ended up in Mitchell, South Dakota.  And Lance's roommate knew my roommate.  (You know where this is going, don't you?)  One night, when Lynette and I were out dancing we ran into the two guys at the local bowling alley / bar / dance club.  She was sure Lance and I would hit it off since we had something in common - we were both from Wisconsin!  Turns out, we had more in common than just the state from which we graduated high school.

Lance and I dated for just under a year while we lived in Mitchell.  Then Lance quit his job and moved to Minneapolis to pursue his MBA and a new job in a new field.  I was transferred by K-Mart to Huron, South Dakota and we did the long distance dating thing for a while.  Eventually, I  saved enough money to live on until I could find a new job, got a ring on my finger, and moved to the Twin Cities.  We were married the year we both turned twenty-five; right according to my life plan.  (Funny how that worked out.)

By then, Lance's parents had moved again.  Now they lived less than twenty miles from my home town - coincidence or fate still at work?  I remember Lance's parents sitting me down and asking me if I knew what I was getting myself into with Lance.  Did I really want to marry their son?  Yes, I did.

Have we had a fairy tale marriage?  Of course not - we live in real life. 

Ups and downs?  Yup, but we knew that we would going in. 

In sickness and in health?  My ruptured appendix and Lance's diverticulitis - I think we have that covered.

For better and for worse?  We have been lucky - the better have always outweighed the worse.

Til death do us part?  That is the plan.

I have now spent more years of my life being married than single.  That is a strange concept.  But, it is also a comforting one.  I love that because of our commitment to each other we have brought a beautiful, smart, strong, compassionate daughter into this world.   I love that we each have someone to share our dreams with - and someone who will encourage the other to follow those dreams.  I love that we push each other to do more than we believe we are capable of.  I love that we can still have adventures together.  I love that we have different strengths and balance each other out.  I love that Lance still wants to dance with me and sing silly little songs to me.  I love that my subconscious humming and wine induced chatter makes him smile.  I love that Lance has a soft spot for our dog Ellie. I love the way his face lights up when he sees me or Kaitlyn.  I love the naughty boy look he gets when he is teasing me.  I love that he doesn't laugh at me when I stop to watch "The Lawrence Welk Show" on PBS.  I love that my friends are his friends - and vice versa. I love that we both think the other has hardly aged since we were married. And I love that, even though we both can annoy each other at times, we have learned to move on - forgive - and forget.  I can't imagine any other life than the one I am fortunate enough to have.

Remembering the past thirty years brings thoughts of the future and begs the question:  Am I looking forward to spending the next umpteen years with my husband and best friend?  As they say in Minnesota....you betcha!